I am...still here and still trying to get by. I don't like those days that I leave my mediocre job and realize that I am just so tired of the politics. I work with people that their politics are ugly. I don't like it. I have a way out, and that is I can quit. I think about my husband that cannot quit his job. I don't think that the AF would appreciate that.
I must constantly remind myself to be patient and good. I must remind myself to care and and not not get overly involved. I can only change myself and locust of control and nothing else. I can be effective by knowing those things and remain true to myself by knowing those things. I must keep positive for Jeremy. He's in such a hard job.
It's tough as a military wife to remember that. Be calm, be collected, and remain neutral at all times. He needs to fight his own battles. When you love someone so much that the happiness overwhelms you at every moment of the day...you get feisty and protective. That is my AF wife lesson today...let them fight their own battles. You will fight your own and do so with grace and charm.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Sitting and Thinking When I Should Be Working!
That's right, I should be working right now, but I'm not! I don't like my job. I have a shady boss that is a gossip and fake. He's a man and I am surprised by his behavior to be honest. But what can you do? You have to make adjustments to the people in your work surroundings. After awhile though, you can no longer make these adjustments. You have to make the change yourself. Do you want to stay or go? The Clash created my in the moment theme song of Should I Stay or Should I Go? I need to get away from a place that I find toxic in my life. We don't need my paycheck. We don't need this hassle in our household...we is my hubby and me. I am going to quit soon and be a stay at home AF wife and go back to school. Peru State College here I come!
My spouses group has had a tragedy happen today that needs to be dealt with. I see little done within my husband's squadron so the spouses must make up for the lack of strong caring. I am very happy to do this because it's my duty. I must provide for the morale of the squadron. I am a spouse of an Air Force man and because of that my purpose is to be as actively involved as possible. I sound old-fashioned but I don't care. This is what we are here for. The military goes through so much and we must care for them.
So, to work I will go...getting my life together and caring for the lives of others. I never thought I would be this way...but I love the moments when I know we're making a difference. A difference is what can be provided.
My spouses group has had a tragedy happen today that needs to be dealt with. I see little done within my husband's squadron so the spouses must make up for the lack of strong caring. I am very happy to do this because it's my duty. I must provide for the morale of the squadron. I am a spouse of an Air Force man and because of that my purpose is to be as actively involved as possible. I sound old-fashioned but I don't care. This is what we are here for. The military goes through so much and we must care for them.
So, to work I will go...getting my life together and caring for the lives of others. I never thought I would be this way...but I love the moments when I know we're making a difference. A difference is what can be provided.
Friday, May 9, 2008
My Birthday
It's today actually. I love my birthday. I am one of the obnoxious people that go around with this insane smile all day long. And to be very honest...I tend to celebrate for much longer. I feel that a birthday is much bigger than one day of celebrations, that it's many days of celebrations.
I have discovered something about myself recently and that is my great soul explorations are coming to an end. I am opening a new chapter in this area. I am settled now and in a good place. I am together in my heart, mind, and most especially my core soul. I started seeing a life coach a few months ago. I have been restless again and when that happens great change always occurs for me. I cannot stay in one place too long and I cannot be one person for too long. I tire of the presentation that I have to give each and everyday. But as always, I must stick it out because we're not moving anytime soon. I must change and adapt to my surroundings and to my chosen life. I got a life coach. What was it that was making me so restless? I don't know and I needed to find out.
I am not like most of my friends that have that job, house, or whatever the case may be. They really seem to have themselves together. They have always known what they want. I have as well, but for me it's been different. For me it's been about figuring out what I don't want. I know a lot about that. What has been so great about this move to Offutt is that I have figured out finally what I want. And I am going to get it and I won't let a thing stop me.
When you are young you fight the system. You fight the values and principles that were instilled in you by you parents, friends, teachers and all the influences around you. You learn that you're supposed to take time to see what's out there and what you really value. I have come full circle. I am more like the girl I was at 17 than I was a few years ago. I loved that girl with all of my heart and I love who I am again with all of my heart.
My life has always been easy because I made it that way and finally I am working for what I want and for my dreams to come true. I have never felt more alive. I have never felt such peace in my soul.
What a good day and what a good year to come. I can't wait.
You will start read more posts about this subject and the subjects of being a military wife. I feel that it is super important and that we need to stick together.
Thank you for letting me bear my heart!
I have discovered something about myself recently and that is my great soul explorations are coming to an end. I am opening a new chapter in this area. I am settled now and in a good place. I am together in my heart, mind, and most especially my core soul. I started seeing a life coach a few months ago. I have been restless again and when that happens great change always occurs for me. I cannot stay in one place too long and I cannot be one person for too long. I tire of the presentation that I have to give each and everyday. But as always, I must stick it out because we're not moving anytime soon. I must change and adapt to my surroundings and to my chosen life. I got a life coach. What was it that was making me so restless? I don't know and I needed to find out.
I am not like most of my friends that have that job, house, or whatever the case may be. They really seem to have themselves together. They have always known what they want. I have as well, but for me it's been different. For me it's been about figuring out what I don't want. I know a lot about that. What has been so great about this move to Offutt is that I have figured out finally what I want. And I am going to get it and I won't let a thing stop me.
When you are young you fight the system. You fight the values and principles that were instilled in you by you parents, friends, teachers and all the influences around you. You learn that you're supposed to take time to see what's out there and what you really value. I have come full circle. I am more like the girl I was at 17 than I was a few years ago. I loved that girl with all of my heart and I love who I am again with all of my heart.
My life has always been easy because I made it that way and finally I am working for what I want and for my dreams to come true. I have never felt more alive. I have never felt such peace in my soul.
What a good day and what a good year to come. I can't wait.
You will start read more posts about this subject and the subjects of being a military wife. I feel that it is super important and that we need to stick together.
Thank you for letting me bear my heart!
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Ready to Scream........
I have those days, when I can't contain the inner person that wants to come out and scream at everyone. I want to scream at how stupid they are and how much they get on my nerves! And I mean that. They get on my nerves!!!!!!! It's mostly the people I work with because for people working on Master's degrees they are stupid.
But today is a day that I may be saved and the reason is that a there is a kick ass job that has opened at the base and I can't wait. I have my cover letter and resume ready to go!!!! I'm very happy about the possibility.
It's fun being a woman that has nothing to lose. The AF moves us all over and I always have to quit a job...therefore I don't need my job or my paycheck...I like that feeling.
More later!
But today is a day that I may be saved and the reason is that a there is a kick ass job that has opened at the base and I can't wait. I have my cover letter and resume ready to go!!!! I'm very happy about the possibility.
It's fun being a woman that has nothing to lose. The AF moves us all over and I always have to quit a job...therefore I don't need my job or my paycheck...I like that feeling.
More later!
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